countryofassholes: ([UK] just do whatever you want.)
The Holy Empire of Britannia ([personal profile] countryofassholes) wrote in [community profile] crackuen2012-03-02 10:38 pm
Entry tags:

Delicious copypasta from [community profile] bakerstreet


How does it work? Simple! Choose a relationship (or roll for one, if it suits your fancy), and then RNG for a situation! That, or just go straight for whatever situation appeals to you. These are all fairly vague: just something to start you off! 


     1. Rock-a-Bye How do you get a fussy child to sleep? Read them a story, sing them a lullaby, or just let them stay up until they exhaust themselves? Whatever the choice, it is time for bed. 

     2. For The First Time You've never met this person in your life, but it turns out they're one of the two reasons you exist. Maybe they walked out when you were young. Maybe they never knew you were born. Whatever the reason, it is now time to meet them. 

     3. Past Midnight That curfew was set for a reason. Now it's two AM, and your kid is just now dragging in. Maybe they're drunk. Or got into a fight. Or just had way too much fun snogging their new love interest. It's time for them to face the music. 

     4. New Home It's the first day of your new life together, as parent and child. Whether it's through adoption, a basket on the front steps, or a wish come true, both of you are going to have to learn to take your steps together. 

     5. Holiday It could be Christmas, Easter, or just a birthday, but it is time to celebrate! Get together for some good old-fashioned family fun. 

     6.Take To Work Day What your parents do for a living is the quickest thing that can turn a kid from boring to the coolest on the block. So whatever the job, from accountant to zookeeper, go to work!

     7. You're Not My Real Dad Being a step-parent (or step-child, for that matter) can be tough. Problem is, you're stuck with each other. So whether you're yelling or just having an awkward conversation, it is time to work things out. 

     8. Unexpected Guardian So you're not the parenting type. Too bad. Situation calls for someone to step up to the plate and look out for this kid, and you're the only one near base. Have fun with that. 


     1. Protective Big Sibling Okay, look. No one gets to mess with your sibling but you. Your little brother or sister is in trouble; let them know you're going to be the one to take care of it. 

     2. Ruining The Night So your sibling has a hot date. You know what that calls for? Making their lives a living hell. 

     3. Newcomer Who is this new kid in your house? Your family has adopted, and now you have to call this stranger family. Welcome them into the house, or let them know how much they aren't wanted. 

     4. Blood Brothers So maybe you aren't really related to this person. That doesn't matter. You're going to change that, right now. In this moment, you will become family. Nothing can break this bond. 

     5. Middle of the Night It's the middle of the night. Your car is broken down, or you're drunk, or you need bailed out, or you just got beat up, or someone just broke up with you. Whatever just happened, it's time to call your sibling and hope they can bail you out. 

     6. Sibling Rivalry Nobody understands what jerks siblings can be! Always in your stuff, messing up your relationships, getting in your way -- it's time for an all out brawl, whether that means yelling, pranking, or fists flying. 

     7. Long-Lost Maybe you've heard of this person. Or maybe they are entirely new to you. However, you've gotten the information that you're more than strangers: you're family. Welcome to each other's lives. 

     8. All Alone Once your family was whole. Or maybe it never truly was. Whatever the case, the world is a big, dangerous place, and you've only got one person left to rely on: your sibling. 


     1. Sent Away There's something bad going on at home, and you've been sent away to "safety." Problem is, how safe is this relative really? Are they the kooky, cool kind of Aunt, or are they a crazed Uncle after your fortune? Time to find out. 

     2. Taking You In Something's happened to your niece/nephew's parents, and it's time to step up and do your family duty. They've got nowhere else to go, after all. 

     3. The One We Don't Talk About So maybe the family is a little bit...ashamed of you. You're a bit mad, or you've done something they just don't like. Yet you want to be part of your niece/nephew's life, and whatever their parents say, you'll find a way. 

     4. Grand Adventure Maybe you came out of nowhere, or maybe you've just been keeping secrets. But you aren't an ordinary aunt/uncle, and it's time to take your niece or nephew on a very wild ride. 

     5. Like A Parent To Me Sure, you have parents, but this person is who your parents should be like -- or maybe who you feel should be your parent in the first place. Let them know how you feel about them. 

     6. Don't Tell Mom Aunts and Uncles have special qualities. Like, sometimes, being a bit more lenient than Mom and Dad might be. So you have a, er, sensitive problem? It's time to run to them. 

In A Relationship

     1. New Baby On The Way The panicking is already over, but there are still preparations to be made. Maybe you need to set up the nursery, or you've got the best idea for your soon-to-be child's name. 

     2. Romeo & Juliet You love this person. Perhaps more than life itself. But it is time to break the bad news: your family will never approve. 

     3. I Think I Might Be Pregnant Somehow, you are pregnant. And you think you know who the father is...time to break the news. 

     4. While You Were Away You've been gone years, only to come back and find your beloved has a child...with your eyes. 

     Of course, you are free to make up your own scenario, or do a relationship not done here! "
unbridledfangs: (where do you place your blame?)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 08:50 am (UTC)(link)
[... well hello really suspicious stomach ache... Wait! There is only one thing it could possibly be!]

... Dahlia.
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (You see?)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 08:51 am (UTC)(link)
Good morning, Kamui.
unbridledfangs: (pic#2390569)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 08:52 am (UTC)(link)
I'm hungry. Give me your blood.

traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (Wibble)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 08:53 am (UTC)(link)
What a horrible thing for you to ask! Of course I won't do that!
unbridledfangs: (the power of my heart is strong.)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 08:55 am (UTC)(link)
You're my sister. [Somehow.] Why not?
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (Shrouded)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 08:56 am (UTC)(link)
That doesn't give you the right to take advantage of my generosity. My health is very fragile, you know! [ no it's not ]
unbridledfangs: (pic#2390562)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 08:57 am (UTC)(link)
[So basically what she's saying is...] Your blood is weak?
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (I would never...)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 09:00 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, that's right. You keep taking it, and now...
unbridledfangs: (long light of the moon.)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 09:06 am (UTC)(link)
... [And he's getting up and going over to the fridge now.]
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (Gentle smile)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 09:07 am (UTC)(link)
I'm very sorry. If you'd like, I can make you some pancakes or something.
unbridledfangs: (with a golden glow.)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 09:08 am (UTC)(link)
That isn't necessary. [He then proceeds to pull out a mound of ham and extends a single fang, slowly cutting into the plastic wrapping as he walks back to her and kicks the fridge door shut with his foot. That complete and a neat circle carved into the wrapper, he sets it before her.]

traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (Pensive)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 09:14 am (UTC)(link)
... excuse me?
unbridledfangs: (being loved without pause.)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 09:16 am (UTC)(link)
I said "eat."

[Stands there impassively.]
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (I would never...)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 09:17 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not hungry. And besides, this is hardly a ladylike breakfast.
unbridledfangs: (even when I don't know.)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 09:33 am (UTC)(link)
You're not a real lady.
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (Pensive)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 09:36 am (UTC)(link)
[ nose in the air! ] I'm still not hungry.
unbridledfangs: (where do you place your blame?)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 09:49 am (UTC)(link)
[For a moment Kamui simply observes her, before he's extending that nail further and making a very neat slice in the ham. That completed, he picks it up and attempts to force place it in her mouth.]
traces: Dahlia Hawthorne (Cornered)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 09:52 am (UTC)(link)
[ She slaps his hand away! Because that the fuck even. ] I'm not your goddamned blood bank, Kamui!
unbridledfangs: (what have you chosen?)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 10:10 am (UTC)(link)
[He frowns at the slap but at least pulls away enough to let her talk.]

You need to eat.
traces: (I will cut you)

[personal profile] traces 2012-03-03 10:12 am (UTC)(link)
I'll eat when I want to eat! Now leave me alone!
unbridledfangs: (scratches on a cracking mask.)

[personal profile] unbridledfangs 2012-03-03 07:02 pm (UTC)(link)
No. [Blunt and immediate reply.]